Posted by on October 21st, 2009
I am one who believes that many a true word is spoken in jest. Perhaps that’s the reason I find common sense and enlightenment in bumper stickers. What? You’re asking if bumper stickers is a veiled reference to men who enjoy anal sex? Gawd! I should have guessed I’d have trouble with you. The answer is no, Socrates. The philosophy I was referring to is not Greek. I meant the messages on adhesive paper that you see on a vehicle’s bumper. Now, please step away from my ass. I don’t speak Greek. LOL
You don’t believe there’s logic worth reflection on bumper stickers? Okay, think about this: “Bear in mind that a man does not have to be a bigamist to have one wife too many.” You don’t understand what being fogbound in Italy has to do with marriage? Gawd! A man wed to more than one woman is a bigamist. You must think I said ”big-a-mist.” LOL Look, get your mind out of the Mediterranean. I told you I don’t speak Greek. LOL
There’s wisdom worth noting in “Don’t be sexist. Broads hate that.” That seemingly simple statement is priceless advice for men smart enough to understand its logic. Why should you care? You want to get laid, right?
Here’s the bumper sticker that helped me survive my second marriage: “Eat a live toad first thing in the morning, and nothing worse can happen to you the rest of the day!” LOL Well, I only blew my husband in the morning, but it had the same effect on my day. LOL
Here’s a bumper sticker to prevent friction in the bedroom: “If you smoke after sex, you’re doing it too fast.” Gawd, you don’t have to be a Vulcan to see the logic there, Mr. Spock. Remember, getting there is half the fun.
I’m health conscious and careful about what, who and how much I eat. That’s one reason this bumper sticker may be important to you: “If we are what we eat, I’m cheap, fast and easy.” LOL And while we’re on the subject, here’s simple logic “If you don’t like oral sex, keep your mouth shut.”
Now, this bumper sticker is very profound: “Sex is like air. It’s not really that important until you’re not getting any.” I would have never thought of that on my own. I mean, if sex is like air, I could be in danger of hyperoxia. LOL
Here’s one that sounds a little harsh, but is a self-evident truth: “To all you virgins, thanks for nothing.” Incidentally, you can thank me ahead of time. Come on, think about it. LOL
One last example of bumper sticker understanding that’s worth remembering if you see me in Philadelphia: “Wink, I’ll do the rest.” LOL
Natasha
phillylady.com
What a great time to come back to my home town. Every one is aware that I am a huge EAGLES fan. However, how can you not get caught up in our Fabulous Phils. The play with such heart and love for the game. I can completely identify…..as that is why I cannot stay away from the hospitality industry.
